Tonight im sitting in my new apartment thinking what im thankful for and its a really surreal moment. I have never had my own apartment before. Im 27 years old , and since the time I have graduated, I have either lived with my parents or relatives. Sitting here alone in my own spot is something I’ve wanted for a while . However as I write this post in my new place , shelter is definitely not the most important thing to me. This year up to date has been one of the most testing periods of my life. Never In my adulthood have I felt such oscillating emotions . If I had to summarize these past 10 months it would be extreme highs and what would appear to be endless depths. I have had doubts of where I need to be (physical location and spiritually ) I have laughed with my dad and I have literally yelled at my dad. I was dating someone and then we broke up , and now im dating someone else. I have cried I have screamed I have had feelings of joy and then depression. Gratitude then Envy then hatred and through it all I’ve grown. I have changed. It has made me into a man.

Two months ago I was at my 5 year reunion, and when I saw some of my boys with their wedding rings on and some classmates with their kids and hearing discussions of Burgeoning business ventures, I honestly got a little down on myself. I started to doubt where I was in life. However, looking back to that introspective moment of sulking , a realization hits me . That’s not your path. YOU choose something different, you choose a different direction. and if you stop being such a punk and open your eyes , you can see what is unfolding. A relationship ended earlier this year, and a new one started. I wanted a new apartment and I finally have one. I have been hungry to spread my wings a little in business and opportunities are starting to present themselves. So to wrap this up, although I am thankful for a lot of small individual things this Thanksgiving season , what I am most thankful for is the process of getting me here to this very spot to write this post and for a consistent God who is anything but variable . That’s all I got to say today.



About Literarydimes

This blog is a reflection of me. My random thoughts and current happenings. Enjoy. Engage. React.
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